If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
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