What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize