I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
