I feel like I'm in dance class right now
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Randomize
