Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
So gin and wine won't be happening again
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
Randomize
