I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
