I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
