thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
