would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
