i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
birth control should be required to get into college
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
