Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
