I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
