he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Randomize
