as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
