This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize