Christians are straight up FREAKS
Don't look now but I am in class with a mixed drink
Don't look now but my prof just asked me if I was drinking a screwdriver
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Randomize
