He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
