Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
