Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
