NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
