i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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