DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Couch. On fire.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize
