What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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