Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
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