TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
