I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
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