can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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