How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
50% drunk capacity currently
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
