I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize
