Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
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