i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I thanked her dad for "firing off a good one" when she was conceived. She said thats why he doesnt like me.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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