We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
Green mimosas i think yes
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
