I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
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