Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
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