That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Turns out that my surprise "happy birthday" drop-in for my dad turned into a "my parents like afternoon sex a lot" realization.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
