I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
