you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
