Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
