doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
