why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Randomize
