Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
