My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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