i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
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