it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize