I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Randomize
