The only way im leaving this casino is in a golden chariot or an ambulance
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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