i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
