You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
