i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
