his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
